We’ve all been there. Summoned to jury duty for your first time you think “Hey, this can’t be as bad as everyone says it is, right?” And then, you get there. It becomes a mad mental dash to figure out your disqualifying excuse of why it is “impossible to serve impartially” before someone else thinks of yours first. So, the people left serving are literally the mentally slowest of your peers. But, a recent story from The Daily News furthers our valid cause for concern with jury quality:
Boston resident Sal Esposito has been called to jury duty, but there’s one thing standing in the way of his ability to serve: He’s a cat.
It turns out there was a mix-up with the census form – Sal is a household pet not a household member. Just tell them he’s a cat sillyyyy.
Anna filed to have her pet disqualified from the service requirement on the grounds he is “unable to speak and understand English.” She even included a letter from her vet explaining that Sal is not a human being but a “domestic short-haired neutered feline.” The court rejected the request, and as things stand, Sal will have to report for duty to Suffolk Superior Crown Court in Boston on March 23.
Obvi. The government really does work like Tina Fey writes it does.